Working mundanely but peacefully in the garden this morning, I unexpectedly found myself singing this quietly to myself. It seemed quite apt.
'Why does he do the things he does?
Why does he do these things?
Why does he march
Through that dream that he's in,
Covered with glory and rusty old tin?
Why does he live in a world that can't be,
And what does he want of me...
What does he want of me?
Why does he say the things he says?
Why does he say these things?
"Sweet Dulcinea" and "missive" and such,
"Nethermost hem of thy garment I touch,"
No one can be what he wants me to be,
Oh, what does he want of me...
What does he want of me?
Doesn't he know
He'll be laughed at wherever he'll go?
And why I'm not laughing myself...
I don't know.
Why does he want the things he wants?
Why does he want these things?
Why does he batter at walls that won't break?
Why does he give when it's natural to take?
Where does he see all the good he can see,
And what does he want of me?
What does he want of me?'
This song has always found a connection with me. Since I was very young. But I never knew why. I guess at the time it was due to the beauty of the interplay between words and music. It's so simple a concept. And the whole story is inspiring too - which I always saw as a delicious romantic fantasy.
Now, I see that my quest to be a goddess relies heavily on what is wanted. I can be what he wants me to be - if I know what that is.
And if it is not too high a windmill.
Post script:
Again with the ps - it's becoming a habit...
Actually, I think this should be about 'What do I want of me?'